Saturday, March 15, 2014

The Stigma of the Homeless


http://www.ehclifebuilders.org
The Stigma of the Homeless

                My first job that I had when I started working in the Mental Health field was working in a complex in Holly, MI called Rose Hill. I was so excited to be working there and to be looking at mental illness through someone else’s eyes. (I actually started my internship there and then started working after the internship). It was the first time that I has stepped outside of my own little world and saw something different and yet there was something very familiar about all of this.

                I got to know many different types of mental illnesses first hand rather than just reading it in a book and trying to decipher what it would look like in real life. You learn that their world is so real to them even though it looks so bizarre to us. Many of them see and hear things that we cannot and they are responding to the stimuli just as if we would if we had someone in front of us talking to us or arguing with us.

                When I left Rose Hill and moved to Seattle I started working in many different areas of the social services department. One of them was working for the people that were homeless. 99 % of the homeless are people that suffer with mental illnesses and are not on medications. Only 1 % of them are men and women that are down on their luck and do not have a home to go to. That only last for a short time if they happen to be homeless for any length of time. This is a good thing for them but a bad thing for all statistics meaning that 99 % of the homeless population will not be able to help themselves, they will need some kind of assistance to get off of the streets.

http://historiccvc.8m.com/
                Back in 1878 Pontiac built its first psychiatric facility. It was called Eastern Michigan Asylum for the Insane. It was changed later on to Eastern Michigan Asylum. It was not until 1911 that they changed the name to Pontiac State Hospital and then to Clinton Valley Center in 1973 before finally being closed down in 1997. The Architecture of this building was spectacular, but what went on inside of this building was far less than impressive.   

                Many of the psychiatric facilities were shut down all around the same time as this one as a federally conformed  project to do away with unacceptable practices towards people that suffered with mental illnesses and those who others “thought” that they did not belong outside in the public. Facilities such as the one in Pontiac were found to be almost like torture chambers with inhuman practices that went far beyond abuse as we know it today. These things will not be known to the public, but I have lived here long enough to know what happened in these facilities before they stopped these practices. Certain types of abuse still remain today and are far less cruel, but are still abuse.

                Now that almost all of the facilities are shut down there was a state by state problem of where to house the people that suffered with mental illnesses. Now we have many different types of places opening up to help people take their medications and learn a trade so that they can try to work and be mainstreamed out into the public. Exactly the opposite of what they were trying to stop about 100 years or more ago. We have finally grown up and are trying to deal with the fact that just because someone looks and acts different does not mean that they are different and they are dangerous. Some were born different, but some were born just as you and I and something happened to them chemically. Their brain synapses are now misfiring just as I was born with a missing chemical in the brain so I have depression.  

                Some of these people were put into group homes, some into hospitals, some after the hospital were put into private facilities like the one that I worked at in Holly and others still went to the streets. It is not because of this that people are on the streets because there is always going to be homeless, but the numbers of the homeless did increase to a larger number creating a new problem for the social services to work through.

                Working in downtown Seattle I discovered a whole different world and loved what I did. They had a unique way of housing the homeless without making them feel like they needed to give something back for it. Many of the homeless are afraid of being cooped up in a room even though they had the right to come and go as they pleased. Whatever they needed was provided for them by the housing that they were given and the funding that they were getting by the state and federal.

                I worked with them helping them by picking up food from the food bank and they could come down and pick up what they wanted according to what I had and a limit of what they could take. And then I would cook a meal for them once a week so that they were eating something healthy at least that much. There was never a moment that was not full of liveliness. Everyone must work with the homeless and get to know them. They are people too and they are proud wonderful interesting human beings.  
 
                Imagine: you are raising a child and he/she is completely normal in your eyes. He/she is doing all of the normal things that a child does through every stage of her/his life. Then…he hits college years and moves into the dorms at the college and you start to see a change. You try to get your daughter to talk, but she is not talking or she is saying nothing is wrong. Suddenly everything comes crashing down around your world as you once knew it and your son is not acting the same at all and ends up in a psychiatric wing in a hospital. You find out that he has schizophrenia and is having audio and visual hallucinations with other psychotic features. You feel like you are going insane also and not sure what all of this means and where to start to begin to understand. Now try to imagine how the person feels that has the illness that is having the hallucinations. He is all of the sudden having these things happening to him and cannot understand why or cannot understand why anyone will not believe him that he is see what he sees or hears.

                Mental illness starts in people at different ranges of ages depending on the disorder. The other thing that usually happens is that mental illness is genetic. One does not have to worry that it is going to happen to them just because they have been near someone else that has it. It is not something you can catch like a cold. People that suffer with mental illnesses are generally harmless very few of them ever become violent. It has been my experience to try to get them on medication for their sake, but sometimes it is not what they want, it is what we want. There are a few medications that the doctors will use just to keep them under control and that is no way of working with them either. To use medications the person has to be willing to do this entirely on his/her own. It cannot be forced and it has to be written in a plan for this person.

                Most of the time the person cannot hack living under the pressure of the medication, the parents looking to them to change and the pressure of them to revert back into a functioning citizen that can pick up where he/she left off. That is when they usually start living on the streets. Some of them never get the right medication regiment and that is what makes them feel uncomfortable. Everyone’s body is different and responds to medication in a different way so it is a set of trial and error when it comes to medication, except they have found a really good medication that works well for schizophrenia that has been around for about 20 years now. It is the only one that has worked on just about everyone. There are a few that cannot take it, but that is very few. I saw them start to use it when I started working at Rose Hill and was so surprised at how it improved when I came back from Seattle years later.        
 
 
Many times people do not want to give money to the homeless when they are panhandling because; “they are just going to go out and buy alcohol and drugs with it anyways.” The first drug of choice for people that suffer with mental illnesses is what they know - alcohol. And if that does not help stop the hallucinations then they turn to drugs. Just about all of them smoke because the smoking has been proven to have a calming effect for them. Alcohol and cigarettes are the first thing that are tried before going to any other drug. If the person does not have a good support system they will continue on the downward spiral with stronger drugs. If they can get someone to help them then they might have a chance to get off of the alcohol and not go towards the drugs.
                People who have been on the street and have not bathed in a while are used to the way that they smell. They do not understand the way people want to back away from them and do not want to talk to them. They have a distorted picture of themselves because of their brain not functioning right. The next time you have a really bad cold and your head feels like it is in a cloud…think about how the people who suffer with mental illness feel all of the time only worse.
 

                I am challenging everyone to at least commit themselves to volunteering once or twice at a soup kitchen or a homeless shelter. It is an eye opening experience and it is fun. Many of the people that are homeless have a story to tell and many do not say anything at all. It is a way of giving back to your community and feeling good about it.    

               

Monday, March 10, 2014

Greatest Quotes


I want to change things up a bit this week. I spend most of my time thinking about how to make people’s lives better. In my world I love to look at things that make me smile because my life is full of heartbreak and I consistently think of the horrible things in this human race.  Quotes from famous people that I love is something that makes my heart warm and makes things feel better for at least one day.
My first favorite person that lived on this earth a very short time was Jesus. Although He had many famous quotes these are a few that should make a heartfelt difference in everyone’s life:
“Let the one among you who is without sin be the first to cast a stone.”
This is a favorite of mine because I have seen and heard so many people wanting to chastise other people for a sin and they are guilty of so many sins themselves. We are all guilty of doing of doing this without even thinking sometimes. Sometimes when we do stop ourselves and think about what we are saying.
“For what shall it profit a man, if he gain the whole world, and suffer the loss of his soul?”
“Do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Let the day’s own trouble be sufficient for the day.”
Albert Einstein was an interesting character. He was unique in many ways and the one that he was most noted for was that he was a genius. Like most people though, he had his problems. He had a hard time in school, so much so that he dropped out of high school and flunked his first college exam. As you can see, just because these things happened to Albert it did not stop him from continuing on and making a better life for himself. As you read his first quote, he was not insane. He would try the same thing over and over again, but expecting different results of course. He made mistakes because he tried new things because without mistakes you learn nothing at all. Keeping yourself safe and closed up you are not learning or anything else, you are just existing. You are not doing anything about your world to make it different. You are living for yourself and not for others. It is a lonely and selfish life. I like Einstein’s last quote that I wrote. To continue working on a problem and trying harder at it means to have veracity. It takes a lot to stay with a problem. It is much easier to give up and pass it on.
 “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”
“A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new.”
“The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil. But because of the people who don’t do anything about it.”
“Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.”
“It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.”
Abraham Lincoln was probably the greatest presidents we ever had. He had much integrity and greatness that followed with him wherever he went. He loved the people in America and the people loved him until he wanted to make everyone equal. It was what was right and it was supposed to be we needed a person like President Lincoln to stand up for the people to get them to stop the tyranny. This first quote really scares me, especially in light of what has been happening lately with our budget and many other things.
“America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be beause we destroyed ourselves.”
“We the people are the rightful masters of both Congress and the courts, not to overthrow the Constitution but to overthrow the men who pervert the Constitution.”
“No man is good enough to govern another man without the other’s consent.”
I believe this quote was made during the time that Lincoln was trying to end slavery, but these are good words to live by. Without your consent no one can tell you what to do or make you feel less than you feel without your God given right. You own the right to your feelings and your body. Do not hand it over without a fight.
“Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them?”
This one is so cool when you really think about what it is saying. You will no longer have any enemies if you make a friend of them because the enemy is now a friend. Ha…no more fighting! So you angry evil people we all love you!
And my favorite:
“Sir, my concern is not whether God is on our side; my greatest concern is to be on God’s side, for God is always right.”
Nelson Mandela:
“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.”
“Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.”
“I detest racialism, because I regard it as a barbaric thing, whether it comes from a black man or a white man.”
“We can’t afford to be killing one another.”
Helen Keller was a person to be revered. She grew up in what I would call terrible conditions. Her mother thought that she was doing what was best by allowing her to do what she wanted to do because she was handicapped, but I just do not see it that way. No one should be allowed to act like an animal just because they cannot do for themselves as others can. They learn in different ways, but they still need to be taught the basics of right and wrong and how to do things for themselves without behaving rudely. Once there was someone in the household that could help Helen, it was obvious that she was a highly intelligent girl and could be taught anything. Do not underestimate anyone just because it “appears” like they do not have what they need to do the right thing or that they are too young. Treat them with exceptional intelligence and they may surprise you.
“The best and most beautiful thing in the world cannot be seen or even touched – they must be felt with the heart.”
“Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much.”
“Faith is the strength by which a shattered world shall emerge into the light.”
“All the world is full of suffering. It is also full of overcoming.”
This last quote I do love for it seems that Helen understood life and death much more than most people.
“Death is no more than passing from one room into another. But there’s difference for me, you know. Because in that other room I shall be able to see.”
I have been looking up many different people that I have admired and I am in awe that each one has some kind of reference to God or the Holy Bible. Their Beliefs were strong and it saddens me that many of our leaders today do not have that same belief system.  Theodore Roosevelt was another one of those powerful leaders with a strong belief.
“A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college education.”
“Believe you can and you’re halfway there.”
“To educate a man in mind and not in morals is to educate a menace to society.”
“A man who is good enough to shed his blood for the country is good enough to be given a square deal afterwards.”
Even Ronald Regan was talking about God in a quote. What he said in one of his quote actually frightens me because they are trying to take the actual words off of our money that we for so many years had it so eloquently written on. This very country was founded on the fact that we are to worship as we wish and now we are not able to do what we have done since the beginning of this country because a few people are offended?
 “If we ever forget that we are One Nation Under God, then we will be a nation gone under.”
“Government’s first duty is to protect the people, not run their lives.”
“Freedom prospers when religion is vibrant and the rule of law under God is acknowledged.”
“Within the covers of the Bible are the answers for all the problems men face.”

What are some of your favorite quotes?

 

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Teen Parents




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Being a mother is always hard and scary for some. I was one of the fortunate ones that found it one of the easiest things to do and one of the best things that I would do in my lifetime. Of course I made it a choice and not one of those things that just seems to happen to many of the people out there that do not think of the consequences of having unprotected sex.
I lived in Seattle, Washington for a little over 5 years and one of the many different jobs that I had was working with teen parents. It was often incommodious to understand that some of these teens would never have gotten this way if they had a different kind of home life. One of the girls was taking care of the parents as well as herself and her child. That was one of the teens that I knew would succeed in life and to this day I have followed her progression and indeed she is doing wonderful.
Some teens try to do the best they can and find out that they cannot make a go of it and finally end up giving their child up for adoption. I commend them for that also. Either way of living is not easy, but a decision has to be made either way.
http://worldpulse.com
Being a mother at an early age is giving up many things in your life. You no longer can act like you are the age you are. You MUST grow up! You cannot have a baby and cart the baby around and treat it like it is a baby doll. The baby is real and he/she has needs. I say this because one of the girls did this and I was appalled, but my job was to be her advocate and to teach her how to be a mother. Of course she was fighting me all of the way, but that did not stop me from trying. You pray for the best for the baby and work with the teen so that she can give the baby the ultimate care. All the baby knows is that is his/her mother and would not know anything different if she acted like a grown up or like a teen ager.
The best advice that I can give to a teenager is to weigh in all of your options. Do you have a home for the both of you? Do you have good support from your family? Would you have someplace to go to help you learn how to be a mother if it is necessary? Will the father be there to help you provide for the baby?
There are so many questions that you need to ask yourself before taking on such a task. Even if you have someplace to go, the bottom line is this is your baby and you must do everything you can for this baby. Do not expect anyone else to do it for you. You must learn to feed the baby, change his/her diapers, learn the signs when he/she is sick, and understand the difference between a cry for hunger, wet and I just want to be held. Babies do not come with a “How to Book”.
When I had my first child I was in for a shock. It seemed like all of the books I read and all of the advice I was given was all wrong. This baby that I had in my arms was not responding to anything that I was told or that I read; he just cried and cried. I held him in my arms and had to put him into a front carrier because he wanted to see what I was doing at every minute every single day, but before I figured that out I either carried him around or tried to put him down to do housework or to eat and he was not having it. One day I was downstairs in my family room and I put him on the couch so that I could vacuum. I neatly tucked him in with pillows and made sure he was secure until I could get the floor done. I looked over while I was vacuuming and he was sound asleep. I’ll be doggone if he did not like the sound of the loud vacuum or the constant noise to help him go to sleep.
To this day he has to have a hum of a fan on to go to sleep at night and since then I have discovered things about myself and going to sleep. Noises that are constant help me go to sleep also. These are some of the many things that you have to discover about your children. You have to keep an open mind, be objective and help them discover not only their talents, but their sense of imagination. I sometimes felt that my children had too many toys to play with and not enough creativity until one day my son was angry with me for putting him the time out chair too many times and wished that I would just spank him and get it over with. I laughed at him because my son was so hyper that the time out chair was so perfect for him. I asked him why he did not just make up stuff in his head while he was there to pass the time. He said he did…he imagined a ball outside the window bouncing up and down, but that just got to be too boring for him. I told him the only other option for him was to stop doing the bad things that he was doing to get him into the chair because spanking was not an option.
To raise a child these days is not just something that we do anymore like it was back when I was a child. I thought of it as a privilege when I had my boys because children are precious and need special care the first few years of their lives. I am dealing with a problem right now that is heart breaking. This mother is old enough to know better, but has never grown up so to speak. She is so needy and wants so much attention that she uses the pregnancies and the children as a way to get that attention. It has taken me and one other woman years to get these children into a certain state of reasonable survival so that they can live without looking like they are animals in the wild instead of little lovable human beings like they are. They did not even know how to shower and wash their own hair because they were not shown how to do the basic things.
I cringe when I think that there are worse living situations out there than these few children that I am managing. This mother was just selfish and other mother’s are too busy trying to get drugs and other things to pay attention to even feeding their children. The children that I am referring to at least got fed even if they had to get it themselves. They were just not clean and not clothed properly. The mother was too busy trying to figure out what she could do for herself instead of clothing the children appropriately or paying attention to bathing them and making sure that they knew how to take care of themselves.
 
I was watching a clip on the awards Sunday night 3/2/2014 and I was happy, ecstatic, and elated for the man that won the award and not because he won the award. Because he was the son of a single mother and was so proud of his mother and was standing there cheering her on. It is not often that you hear that from a child of a single mom and especially from a son of a single mom. Like I said before; it is with great difficulty that you raise children and to raise them as a single mom is so much more difficult. I cheer on the mothers that can do it and do it with success and great pride:
                            http://youtu.be/jmg8wTyht-c


I believe that many women can probably relate to my story: I was married with three boys and I did not receive much help if any at all with those boys. As they grew I did not receive any help at all and then they grew to an age where they wanted to do more in their lives rather than just stay home. So I started carting them all over the place-soccer, golf, dance…you get the picture. So you become and single married mother. By the time my eldest was 13 I was finally single and then I really had a plateful. I not only had to cart them around, but I had to work and go to college. I know the difficulties of raising children alone, but financially I did have help. The story that this man talks about on stage is a miracle to me. She did it alone and I praise that woman for that.
  
DO SOMETHING.ORG:
 
11 Facts About Teen Pregnancy
1. 3 in 10 teen American girls will get pregnant at least once before age 20. That’s nearly 750,000 teen pregnancies every year.
 
2. Parenthood is the leading reason that teen girls drop out of school. More than half of teen mothers never graduate from high school
 
3. Less than 2 percent of teen moms earn a college degree by age 30
 
4. About a quarter of teen moms have a second child within 24 months of their first baby.

5. The United States has one of the highest teen pregnancy rates in the western industrialized world.

6. From 1990 to 2008, the teen pregnancy rate decreased 42 percent (from 117 to 68 pregnancies per 1,000 teen girls).

7. In 2008 the teen pregnancy rate among African-American and Hispanic teen girls, age 15 to 19, was over two and a half times higher than the teen pregnancy rate among white teen girls of the same age group.

8. 8 out of 10 teen dads don’t marry the mother of their child.

9. A sexually active teen who doesn’t use contraceptives has a 90 percent chance of becoming pregnant within a year.

10. Almost 50 percent of teens have never considered how a pregnancy would affect their lives.

11. Teens had fewer babies in 2010 than in any year since the mid-1940s.



I would like everyone to go to DoSomething.ORG and check out their sight. They have something for everyone not just for the Teen Parents. There are causes for everyone that is interested in helping out; Bullying, Animals, Homeless, etc.